When All Else Fails

. . . try making fun of them.


The Battle Hymn of the Empire

O mine eyes have seen the glory of the Pax Americana:
where there's anything of value, be it oil or bananas,
our corporations gather like mechanical piranhas --
then our troops go marching in!

Glory, glory, it's pre-emptive --
Glory, glory, it's redemptive --
But all the while we know the real incentive
is Money in the Bank!

O the peasants of the world get silly notions in their heads,
like the right of common people to respect and work and bread;
just whisper "Land Reform" and we see Reds beneath our beds --
then our troops go marching in!

We love to call it patriotic,
when we rush to aid regimes despotic;
admittedly it seems a bit myopic --
but the Money's in the Bank!

O we needn't fear the public 'cos our media are tame,
we can trust them to conceal the dirty details of our game;
the voters never know what we get up to in their name
when our troops go marching in!

We're building bases in Malaysia
and every 'stan in Central Asia;
the profit-margins would amaze ya!
and it's Money in the Bank.

We admit no God but Mammon: every prayer's a sales pitch.
We obey no law but Darwin's: social justice makes us itch.
As we strive to make them stupid, let them die to make us rich --
let the troops go marching in!

Disease, disaster, radiation;
climate change, deforestation;
hunger, fear and degradation:
and it's us they have to thank!

Poisoned water, ruined soil:
grief and rage and vengeance on the boil.
Who cares? what really matters is the Oil --
and the Money in the Bank.

[all together now!]

Glory, glory, it's pre-emptive --
Glory, glory, it's redemptive --
But all the while we know the real incentive
is Money in the Bank!

-- GPL Mar 2003 D. A. Clarke


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De Clarke